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10/06/2006: "Let me break it down for you"

music: Poe - Dolphin
mood: appalled

Listen to me.

The restroom is a no talking zone. It is also a no eye contact zone.

Speed is of the essence here, folks. Get in, get it done, wash your hands, leave. Greeting new arrivals by name makes everyone uncomfortable.

If someone has just left a stall and there is another stall open, do not use the recently vacated one. Lingering odors are another source of restroom shame.

Do not, under any circumstances, use a stall directly adjacent to an occupied stall unless you have no choice.

We're all in this together.